Pursuing Passion

In high school, I gave my valedictorian speech on the importance of pursuing your passion and following your dreams. I was about to enter a new phase of life that would allow just that, and while terrifying, I was excited by the possibilities that lay before me. I have always lived by this mantra and have preached for many years the importance of working in a field you enjoy rather than one that makes the most amount of money. You see, I define success as that which brings the greatest amount of inner happiness and contentment.

Yet despite these beliefs, despite my words, and despite my actions (I mean, I majored in journalism, which is obviously not profitable), I still found myself doing the exact opposite of everything I’ve ever believed in when presented with job opportunities upon graduating. It’s so easy for the fears of life to take over when you’re newly married, unemployed, and supposed to be financially independent all within one month!

Long story short, I took the job that screamed “success” as the world would define it. A nice title, a corporate company, and dollar signs were offered to me in a time of such fear and desperation, that it only seemed right for me to say yes. It didn’t take long for me, though, to realize that was NOT the future God had in mind for me. If I hadn’t walked through those doors, however, I wouldn’t be where I am today: a place of humility, faith, and gratitude.

I briefly mentioned last week the struggles I faced in this most recent season of life and what a test my job alone was to both my spiritual life and marriage. I struggled to find confidence in myself, I battled with my faith in the Lord’s plan for my life, and I fought with my husband more than ever. After realizing that I wasn’t supposed to continue working in this position, I began to fear what was to come. I mean, it took me months to find this job to begin with, how was I supposed to find another one so quickly?! What would people say when they heard I couldn’t last more than three months in my first job? What will my husband think when I tell him I want to leave my job and risk our financial stability? Every single one of these questions pervaded my mind for a month straight, and some days I could find peace with each one resting in the Lord, while others I tried to handle it myself, resulting in panic attacks and anxiety. Needless to say, the past couple of months were not pleasant, yet I am SO thankful for them!

When I began searching for jobs, I had to learn humility in its truest form. I spent weeks on end calling almost every contact in my phone to ask for a job. I spent hours looking on job boards for work. I applied to at least 20 different positions. I interviewed with multiple companies, and I ultimately had to drop my façade, letting people know that I DO NOT have my life “together.” There are few things more humiliating than being proud in front of the people who like your photos only to call them and beg for a job in reality. People are kind, though, and God is good, because He opened doors faster than I could have ever imagined.

I was humbled and completely stripped at this point of any attitude I had before, yet fear began to sink in. I knew I was ready to leave this position, but I had no clue how. All of my initial phone calls led to dead ends, and I was scared to take another job and have this happen all over again. I was scared of the future and blind to what was in store. I had days of great fear, and I had days of great faith, but trust me when I say that the Lord hears all of our prayers, because on those good days, I would ask for Him to open my eyes, making my path so obvious I couldn’t miss it, and open the doors I was supposed to walk through. When it didn’t happen immediately, I let fear creep in, but when He would move in the slightest bit, I couldn’t help but find peace!

After so much frustration and anguish, a door opened: I was offered an interview by a local business, and I suddenly realized there was no need to worry about my future. I stopped questioning the Lord’s motives, stopped stressing, and stopped speaking negatively about my situation, only to find that another door opened with another job opportunity, and then another, and then another, to the point where I found myself worrying about which job to take! There was no denying that God was moving through my situation, and that was His way of showing me just how in-control He actually is, ultimately giving me the confidence to end up where I am today.

You see, seasons of spiritual growth in life are long processes filled with almost too many lessons to capture in one blog post. They’re full of ups and downs but ultimately result in more than we can imagine. In my case, I learned a LOT over the past couple of months, and if it weren’t for each of these aspects I’m explaining to you, I wouldn’t have the humility, the confidence, or the faith to pursue my dreams today, which is why I am so thankful for the past three months, as they have opened my eyes to a future I could have never imagined for myself.

If you’ve made it this far, thanks for reading! I appreciate it more than you know! If you’ve come from my social media posts, I’m sure you’re here to figure out why I'm currently wearing scrubs. Needless to say, I found the courage to leave my job – so much courage that I had no other plans or offers upon turning in my notice. I was unemployed and at peace with the entire situation, yet I knew I couldn’t sit around the house with no form of income, so I found a temporary job as a chiropractic assistant for a three-week period, filling the time between jobs. Don’t worry, I’m not going back to school or trying to pursue an entirely different field, I honestly just needed work!

What’s next, though? Well, that's the entire point of this post. Once I abandoned all of my fears to God, He miraculously opened my eyes to the most obvious career path that has laid before me for years: pursuing makeup full-time. In 9th grade, I began doing makeup for friends who attended prom and homecoming and slowly but surely gained more clients. Three years ago, I did my first wedding and am now the preferred makeup artist for a local venue. Doing makeup has always been something that I have loved but have been too scared to pursue because it’s “not practical” or “too much fun,” but I have finally realized that my abilities as a makeup artist are a gift that can be used to pursue my dream of owning my own business. I never had confidence to even think about pursuing this full-time, but now I’m charging full-steam-ahead and am constantly blown away by how the Lord continues to provide for me!

This website, this blog, and my social media platforms are all tools in expanding my business while sharing the goodness of what the Lord is teaching me along the way. So, I am excited to announce that along with this website and pursuit of my career as a makeup artist, I will officially begin work next week as both a marketing associate for an online boutique based out of the Auburn area and an assistant in a brand new salon in downtown Opelika! The marketing position will allow me to continue using the skills and knowledge obtained from my degree while simultaneously teaching me new strategies and techniques for operating my own business, while my assistantship in the salon will allow me the opportunity to meet potential new clients, give me a space for my work, and in turn teach me another trade that goes hand-in-hand in my dream career.

I am so grateful and so thankful for these opportunities, for the future that lies ahead, for the Lord’s provision, and that you took the time to read this entire post! If you know what you need to pursue and have dreams given to you by the Lord, I encourage you to let go of your fears and trust Him to provide in this new season. He’s never once let me down, and I am certain that He never will, and trust me, I’m no different than you!

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